Locked away

Rob and Isolde wouldn’t talk to each other for the next week or so.

I honestly have no idea what to do. I hate this feeling, when people expect you to take a side, but you don’t want to lose anyone involved. I remembered how my parents fought each other and then asked me who was right. Yeah, not your parents-of-the-year candidates. I got used to those fight and started  not to care anymore. It wasn’t like I had a super tight relationship with any of them anyway.

            But this is different. I thought of yelling at Rob and forced him to apologizing, or comforting Isolde and saying that what Rob said was stupid. I can’t. I can’t lie to her. I kinda want her to absorb what Rob said. But this thing has to be resolved. But I don’t want to lose anyone. But Rob was wrong and he should apologize. But he was kinda right…. URGH!!!

            It does seem Rob’s words affected Isolde. She reduced the frequency of those glossed lips moving into a smile. She looks quiet. And lonely. She stops sitting with our table. Everyone seems to notice but I don’t know if anyone really cares. Rob is obviously still stubborn about the conflict, but even her friends aren’t really interested in finding out where she’s at. I fought the urge to look for her, telling myself that every is going to be alright.

            I couldn’t stand it after the third day she’s not showing up to our table. I didn’t bother getting lunch, although teriyaki chicken would have me drooling any other day. But it can wait. The more important thing is to find Isolde, both physically and emotionally. So I go on a journey to discover where she’s at. I ran like a madman across the campus, where I couldn’t catch any sight of her. The only place left to find was the theater, which lies on the other side of Cantwell Hall. I don’t have any classes there in all my years here, so that’s the last place I can think of. But why would Isolde go there? I don’t think it’s even open for students at lunch.

So I jump out to the field of grass on the other side of the building. To my surprised, I see someone sitting on the grass, with her back leaning against the wall, her legs curling up, pushing the laptop on her thigh higher so the sun wouldn’t shine onto the screen. The newly-hightlighted hair stays unbrushed and falls to the keyboard. Her elegant face fades away, accentuating her rosy cheeks, which are quickly covered by a slight movement of her hair. I smile, for almost no reason. I pace toward her, lean my back against the wall and sit down. I put my arms on my knees and look toward the distant horizon behind the mountains I have ever grown to love.

“You know, you don’t have to be here. I’m fine.”- Isolde breaks the everlasting silence.

“You’re right. I don’t have to be here. I want to be here.” I turn my head sideway, gazing at her eyes.

Silence…

Silence…

“You know Rob is an idiot?” It is my turn to break the dreaded emptiness.

Isolde finally looks up from her screen.

“It’s funny how he claims he’s the smartest guy in the class and he lost a game of chess to me while he had a queen and a bishop left while I only have a horse and some cons. In the same sense, he could have meant what he said, but he could also deliver it better.”

“Do you think it was my fault?” Isolde looks back at her laptop again, but I know she’s paying attention to what I have to say.

“Does it matter?”

“It does to everyone else.”

“It doesn’t to me.”

“Why?”

I pause. I put my leg down and slightly put my hand on the top of her computer, pushing it in. Isolde doesn’t oppose, so I close her laptop’s lid. She relaxes her fingers and packs the computer away.

“Because I value you, no matter what. What happened in the past already happened in the past. I don’t have to know your past to know your present. It doesn’t matter to me because I would always have your back, that means even when you’re wrong. Of course, I would try to advise you that your decision might not be appropriate, but if you already made a decision,” I sigh slightly, “I will be there for you if you need. So in a sense, Rob was right that on the surface, you were the one who factor into how people see you right now. But how I see you won’t be affected by how others see you, because you’re worth more to me than to others.”

“Thank you.”

No other words are spoken until the bell rings.

Both of us are too emotionally drained to say anything else.